About even day
Oct. 26th, 2004 03:12 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
leahbobetSo far, not a good or bad day, but kind of even. For example:
Pro: it is sunny and I got a contract and a cheque in the mail.
Con: the cheque will not be enough for a new desk chair, as mine is on the last wheezing gasps of existence (the back fell off this morning and I had to jury-rig it).
Pro: I have my time largely to myself to write.
Con: I have a lot of errands to run today, and should be looking for a second job. And am having an I Suck week and haven't written much anyways.
Pro: I'm officially no longer in school -- and this is a pro because it wasn't until I was made to leave that I realized just how miserable and horrid to be around academia makes me.
Con: Gotta tell my parents that, and they won't be pleased. And the finding a second job thing.
And so on, and so forth.
Did manage to add a poem to the Bitter Fairytale Series last night (called Clothbound), and the whole two people I showed it to were blown on their asses, even though I think it's mostly just bitter. Sent it off to market on their recommendation: I expect that if it is published, people will e-mail me and inquire nervously as to the state of my relationship. But in the light of day, I think I might be seeing what they saw in it; has a good rhythm. Perhaps more Bitter Fairytale Poetry tonight, if I can maintain my irritation at the Brothers Grimm and Hans Christian Andersen for that long.
(Aside: Bitter Fairytale Poetry arises from my love of fairytales conflicting with my continuing belief that fairytales are really not a healthy thing to read to children. They lead us to believe that the world is good and true, and that handsome princes exist if we only wait for them, and that beauty is indeed the paramount virtue a woman can have. They are not a good preparation for life. They leave one damaged and physically insecure and waiting until one dies for a man who never measures up to some artificial standard. This does not mean I don't enjoy them, just...it's a recognition of the baggage they can put in a person's head.)
Perhaps also the beginning of Toronto Book Draft Three tonight. Revising suits my moody mood.
And I go.
Pro: it is sunny and I got a contract and a cheque in the mail.
Con: the cheque will not be enough for a new desk chair, as mine is on the last wheezing gasps of existence (the back fell off this morning and I had to jury-rig it).
Pro: I have my time largely to myself to write.
Con: I have a lot of errands to run today, and should be looking for a second job. And am having an I Suck week and haven't written much anyways.
Pro: I'm officially no longer in school -- and this is a pro because it wasn't until I was made to leave that I realized just how miserable and horrid to be around academia makes me.
Con: Gotta tell my parents that, and they won't be pleased. And the finding a second job thing.
And so on, and so forth.
Did manage to add a poem to the Bitter Fairytale Series last night (called Clothbound), and the whole two people I showed it to were blown on their asses, even though I think it's mostly just bitter. Sent it off to market on their recommendation: I expect that if it is published, people will e-mail me and inquire nervously as to the state of my relationship. But in the light of day, I think I might be seeing what they saw in it; has a good rhythm. Perhaps more Bitter Fairytale Poetry tonight, if I can maintain my irritation at the Brothers Grimm and Hans Christian Andersen for that long.
(Aside: Bitter Fairytale Poetry arises from my love of fairytales conflicting with my continuing belief that fairytales are really not a healthy thing to read to children. They lead us to believe that the world is good and true, and that handsome princes exist if we only wait for them, and that beauty is indeed the paramount virtue a woman can have. They are not a good preparation for life. They leave one damaged and physically insecure and waiting until one dies for a man who never measures up to some artificial standard. This does not mean I don't enjoy them, just...it's a recognition of the baggage they can put in a person's head.)
Perhaps also the beginning of Toronto Book Draft Three tonight. Revising suits my moody mood.
And I go.
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no subject
Date: 2004-10-26 12:46 pm (UTC)I completely agree with you. And a lot of people go through part of their lives believing that and then get to the point where they are Unfairytaled. That point would probably be so much easier if they didn't believe in them in the first place. But I think it's so engrained that they can't help still hoping for one even after they've been unfairytaled.
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Date: 2004-10-26 12:58 pm (UTC)The back of my chair is currently held on with rope. Steven's fell apart and was put back together crookedly, so it throws a sitter's spine way out of wack. Come to think of it, our dining room chairs are falling apart too, as is the papasan, and our futon groans alarmingly. They'll probably all die together in some sort of Jonestownesque mass suicide.
And I finished the revision, if I haven't mentioned that already. Happy goodness, with comments to follow.
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Date: 2004-10-26 02:38 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-10-26 04:26 pm (UTC)If academia makes you unhappy, then I'm glad you left. And I'm not surprised your poem blew people away. You got 'it', whatever it is, in the word department. ;)