I can't believe I'm still getting you all to entertain me for free

[leahbobet]

Okay, looks like a long day ahead, after which I will want to be amused! And entertained! And scintillated! And surely, you do too!

Therefore?

Yes.

Contest.


Since other people, when they are bored or upset, turn to collections of rights-grabbing anthologies of vaguely inspirational literature instead of internet amusement and/or pictures of cats with badly spelled text on them, and since my Patriarchy class last night discussed the coupling between food and care and how certain feminist theorists think this needs to be uncoupled, and since I think it's funny--

Today, it is of paramount importance to fill in this book title:

Chicken Soup for the _____________ Soul, a tender collection of _____________

Example solutions include:
Chicken Soup for the Chicken's Soul, a tender collection of reflections on the experience of slavery, exile, and cannibalism.

As usual, show all work for your fabulous undisclosed internet prizes!

Comments

[ringwoodcomics.livejournal.com]

Chicken Soup for the Emo Soul, a tender collection of being a stupid whiny pussy who doesn't know more than four chords.

[hawkwing-lb.livejournal.com]

Because I have an assignment due Monday:

Chicken Soup for the (ancient) Historian's Soul, a tender collection of essays about murder, genocide, and political manipulation in the ancient world.

...and:

Chicken Soup for the Theologian's Soul, a tender collection of stories reflecting on arcane points of philosophy and hell.

Yes, I'm feeling bitter tonight. :)

[mmerriam.livejournal.com]

Chicken Soup for the Privileged White Male Soul, a tender collection of stories on the horrors and difficulties of being the Masters of the Universe.

[sksperry.livejournal.com]

Chicken Soup for the Cannibal Soul, a tender collection of tender confections.

Soul

[(Anonymous)]

Chicken Soup for the Scientist's Soul, a tender collection of undisputed facts and annotated charts to support them.

Kell

[blackaire.livejournal.com]

I need to stop entering your contests. My co-workers aren't accustom to me laughing and I think it's upsetting their notion of reality.

Ahem. May I present:

Chicken Soup for Cthulu's Soul, a tender collection of soft and slimy things, gibbering things born in the dark swamps of R'lyeh while the Old Ones dreamed, a descent into madness borne on a black plague-wind from the desolation of the human soul. Plus helpful tips on tax breaks for your cult of worshippers, who revere your most horrible form and offer their very blood.

[clarentine]

Chicken Soup for the Serial Killer's Soul, a tender collection of recipes and rituals from the files of Tobias Henkel.

[ccfinlay.livejournal.com]

Chicken Soup for the Sadist's Soul, a tender collection of brutalism.

Chicken Soup for the Cobbler's Soul, a tender collection of durable soles.

Chicken Soup for the Processed Meatpacker's Soul, a tender collection of chicken tenders.

[carolhelga.livejournal.com]

Chicken Soup for the Addict's Soul, a tender collection of reflections on good trips, bad trips and compulsive behavior.

Chicken Soup for the Manic/Depressive's Soul, a tender collection of ups and downs.

Chicken Soup for the Fanatic's Soul, a tender collection of reflections on destroying the Great Satan.

[hawkwing-lb.livejournal.com]

I would so definitely read such a 'tender collection'.

(What about my sanity? Sanity? What is this sanity you speak of? :))

[phantom_wolfboy]

Chicken Soup for the Zombie's Soul, a tender collection of Braaaains!

[wood-dragon.livejournal.com]

Chicken Soup for the Blogger's Soul, a tender collection of memes, flames and random comments

Chicken Soup for the Barista's Soul, a tender collection of reflections on the daily grind

[dsgood.livejournal.com]

Chicken Soup for the Vegan Soul, a tender collection of sins against all life.

[msisolak.livejournal.com]

Chicken Soup for the Writer's Soul, a tender collection of syntactically-challenged, wildly-inaccurate rejections, bedecked with rampant misspellings.

[tanaise.livejournal.com]

Chicken Soup for the Third-World Countries's Soul, a tender collection of reflections on famine, genocide, and dictatorships.

[haruhiko.livejournal.com]

Chicken Soup for the Trilobite's Soul, a tender collection of musings on what we might be eating for dinner 540 million years from now, when the animals and plants we use for food have either gone extinct or have evolved beyond recognition.

Also (because I refuse to play against type!):

Chicken Soup for the Slasher's Soul, a tender collection of stories where every protagonist drinks a deus ex machina magical chicken soup which causes them to come down suddenly with the urge to have copious buttsex with their greatest nemesis.

Plot generator

[gvwilson.livejournal.com]

Not quite what you asked for, but it comes with pictures! http://www.plotshot.com

[lisamantchev.livejournal.com]

Chicken Soup for the Muppet Soul, a tender collection of faux fur, felt and musical numbers!

Hi, Leah! *was the OTHER one in the corset at WFC*

[interabang.livejournal.com]

Chicken Soup for the Narcissist's Soul, a tender collection of all things you.

[leahbobet.livejournal.com]

hee, I remember. *g*

Hi, Lisa!

The court-mandated sequel to Chicken Soup for the Id

[(Anonymous)]

Chicken Soup for the Super-Ego, a tender collection of sober second thoughts, profuse apologies and repressed urges. With testimonials by Michael Richards, Isaiah Washington and Harlan Ellison. Dave Nickle